I have always been very self confident in my abilities.
This means sometimes it's difficult for me to be "dependant" upon the Lord
in the way He wants me to be.
Now, put me in the Emergency room
having a heart attack,
and I can be "very dependent" upon the Lord.
I had NO "self sufficiency" to rely upon.
I found it easy to put myself
completely into the Lord's hands.
Looking to Him - Trusting in Him for my life
( whether it was to continue
or end that night..
totally up to Him ).
And I had peace through the whole process
From the operating room
where I had my stents inserted,
To lying awake all night in ICU.
Lots of time to talk to the Lord
about His plan for my future.
It's been a little harder to have this same focused faith
in my everyday life....
Because my fleshly mind thinks I can "do things",
and therefore I forget
or find it hard to "depend" upon the Holy Spirit.
To look to Jesus.
To pray to the Father.
I just "do" what comes to my mind,
and use my "ability" to "do".
So.... being a "self starter"
and having "confidence" in one's own ability
can a hindrance to anyone wanting to serve the Lord
and to allow Him to do His Work through you.
We must learn to rely upon the "Vine"
and realize we are just the "Branch".
Jesus clearly tells us in John 15:5
Without Him, we can do nothing.
**** With AI editing :
Spoken Testimony Script
I’ve always been a very self-confident person.
Confident in my abilities.
Confident that I can figure things out.
Confident that I can do what needs to be done.
And because of that…
it’s sometimes been hard for me
to truly depend on the Lord
in the way He wants me to.
But then—
put me in an emergency room…
having a heart attack…
And suddenly, dependence comes very easily.
In that moment,
I had no strength to lean on.
No abilities to rely on.
No self-sufficiency left at all.
I couldn’t do anything.
And because of that,
I found it easy—
almost natural—
to place myself completely
into the Lord’s hands.
I looked to Him.
I trusted Him with my life.
Whether it would continue…
or end that very night…
that decision was fully up to Him.
And somehow—
in the middle of all of it—
I had peace.
From the operating room,
where the stents were inserted…
to lying awake all night in the ICU…
I had time.
A lot of time.
To talk with the Lord
about His will
and His plan for my future.
And what stood out to me most
was how focused my faith was then.
How completely dependent I became
when I had nothing left to offer Him
but trust.
But I’ve noticed something since then…
Living with that same level of dependence
in everyday life
is much harder.
Because when there’s no crisis…
my fleshly mind tells me,
You’ve got this.
You can handle it.
You know what to do.
So instead of relying on the Holy Spirit…
instead of looking to Jesus…
instead of praying to the Father…
I just do.
I act on my own thoughts.
I lean on my own ability.
And I’ve realized this:
Being a self-starter…
having confidence in your own strength…
can actually become a hindrance
to serving the Lord.
It can get in the way
of allowing Him
to do His work through you.
Jesus tells us plainly—
we are not the Vine.
He is.
We are just the branches.
And He makes this statement unmistakably clear:
“Without Me…
you can do nothing.”
That’s not just true
in the emergency room.
That’s true
every single day.